BABES

Advertising Disclosure: Apparently with recent legislation I actually have to call out if I advertise a brand that I write about. In this instance, I believe I have an affiliate account with American Apparel but I’m not running any ads from them nor was I paid to promote this article.. fuck, lawyers are annoying. On to the goods…

K. Now that that crap is out of the way… American Apparel, clothier to hipsters the world over, has created a contest of complete genius. They set out to find the best ass on the planet. Hipsters or no, that’s a movement I can get behind. Get it.. behind. Ha, I kill myself. But seriously, they have over 1300 pics of some of the hottest pieces of “A” I have ever seen. The images below are a sampling… hit their site for the complete run.

Craving More?

Full, full disclosure – I got through 3 pages before I broke into a cold sweat and started convulsing on the ground. Hats off you good sirs.. hats off.

As the Olympics get underway, I have to say I am a little underwhelmed with the “talent” of the athletes (and I’m not referring to physical prowess here). Still, there are a few that warrant gold medal status.. yeah, baby. Take Allison Baver for instance. She’s a short track speed skater meaning she has an ass that won’t quit and if you found yourself so lucky as to be positioned between her thighs, she could crack your ribs like a walnut in a nutcracker. Wow.. just sent shivers down my spine. These are some of the best shots I’ve found…

Craving more? Thighs of steel I tell ya. Thighs of steel.

Sorry all for the lack of posts lately.. been a busy start to the semester to say the least. But lets let bygones be bygones. Alright.. I really have nooooo idea who Julia Mancuso is. I do know Lange ski boots and their ad campaign using Julia Mancuso is brilliant. I guess they really took the old adage “sex sells” to the max.

So my girlfriend just received the latest Shape magazine. I read it. Oh yeah I do. You know why? Cause it’s got better pics of hot chics bending over in tight outfits and bikini’s than Maxim. Trust me. I spend 14 hours a day scanning magazines and web sites looking for pics of hot chics bending over in tight outfits and bikinis. I would know. Anyway, on the cover is a bikini clad, smoking hot and blond Katherine McPhee. Now, it’s no secret that I’m a huge.. HUGE fan of brunettes but I gotta say, McPhee is looking pretty awesome. But I’m not convinced… what are your thoughts? Blond or Brunette?

Blond or Brunette? Yes, Please.

I guess ice skating is the ONLY sport that seems to produce any type of decent looking specimens. This time it’s the Finnish team give ole Team USA a run for their money. We’ve got nordic beauty Kiira Korpi. Wow. Need to work on these names. Tanith Belbin. Kiira Korpi. Babidy Boopi.. babidy boopi. Anyway, there’s even a behind the scenes topless shot. Jackpot!

So far that last shot and the Tanith Belbin topless shot are in the running for gold. Stay tuned for more Olympic Hotties.. I’m just getting warmed up!

I’ve never heard of the name “Tanith” or “Belbin” before so I’m pretty sure this chick is a robot from the future sent to destroy mankind. Wait, what? Anyway, I usually avoid watching pairs figure skating. It’s usually a bunch of silliness where the dudes are prettier than the chicks. But not in this case. Tanith Belbin could be skating with an orangutan in a yellow thong and I’d still be glued to the television.

Can’t wait to see her in the SI Swimsuit Issue.. surprised it hasn’t happened already.

Oooooh boy. Those winter Olympics are right around the corner and that means one thing… FIGURE SKATING!! Ok, so that’s not really what you were expecting me to say. As a sport it ranks right up there with competitive hot dog eating with one exception – the American team happens to be chock full of hotties and they all happen to wear skimpy outfits and spread their legs a lot. Well, that didn’t really come out right but you get my point. Starting the run to the podium is none other than Sasha Cohen.

I was just saying to my pastor the other day, “When the fuck is Olivia Munn gonna be in Maxim and show us some of that sweet ass in sexy bikini shots?” To which my pastor replied, “Fuckin-A, right?”. Well, apparently padre put in a good word with the big man because we have none other than the hottest piece of ass this decade in Maxim this January. Thank you, Jesus. Thank you.

Hit the gallery for the rest of the shots.. we’ll try to get some high resolution bad boys when they’re available..

Apparently when you’re a former Playboy playmate, bras are optional. And I only have one thing to say to that.. AMEN! I always kinda wondered what happened to Victoria Silvstedt. I also wondered how to pronounce her last name. Actually, they’re both lies. I just wondered why she never called me. CALL ME, VICTORIA!!

Anyone else thing ole Victoria is looking a little beat in these shots?? She’s actually 36 now which technically makes her a cougar. But still…

Admittedly, I have really followed the Tiger Woods “thing” that closely. It’s really just a lot of conjecture and rabid rumor mongering. However, at this point it pretty much established that he boned someone other than his wife. And that makes him an idiot. Dumber than dumb. Actually, technically speaking… he should probably be classified as mentally retarded. I forgot just how hot his wife actually is…

So let’s get this straight. She’s from Sweden. She’s a model. She’s chesty (to say the least). So that makes her a chesty, Swedish model. Oh.. and she’s the mother of your children for Christ’s sake. Tard. I’m done.